How to Build and Maintain a Successful Marriage

It takes a conscious effort to build and maintain a great marriage relationship. The initial fireworks of new love don’t last forever, but they can be replaced by something deep, true, and enduring. Here are some ideas for maintaining a successful marriage.

Husband and Wife Must Understand Each Other’s Needs and Wants

There is no room for selfishness in a marriage. An important element of a good relationship is for a spouse to put the other’s needs before his or her wants. If both spouses always have the other first and foremost at heart, the result is mutual love, respect, and harmony.

Common Goals and Open Communication Between Spouses

Having the same goals and working together towards them eliminates many points of conflict. Two people who want different things are not traveling toward the same end. A marriage is a partnership, and a partnership requires a common objective. From time to time, partners prefer to use a website to talk to strangers instead of communicating with each other.

Sometimes spouses expect their partner to be mind readers. Contrary to popular assumption, no one is clairvoyant. Communication is an essential aspect of any relationship, and even more important in a marriage. Making the time to talk will help to ensure a healthy and continuous rapport.

Marital Finances – The Money Thing

Often the greatest source of conflict in a relationship is the subject of money. Differing spending and saving habits can easily cause a dividing line between two camps. Consider mutually creating a budget and agreeing on the amount of cash flow.

In a marriage, the “me” should be replaced by “we.” It is important to communicate and agree upon purchases, especially large ones before they are made.

Keep the Relationship Fresh

When the fireworks of a new relationship fizzle away, it can be easy to let things become routine and monotonous. Doing little things such as being spontaneous or planning surprises can help to keep the flame of romance burning brightly.

Marriage Partners Must be Honest with Each Other

Trust is the foundation upon which any successful relationship is built. Without this foundation, no relationship can flourish, and if the foundation is broken, it is often extremely difficult to build it back up. As cliché as it may sound, honesty between a husband and wife is the best policy.

Be Appreciative of and Do Things for Each Other

The longer the time spent in each other’s company, the easier it often is to take each other for granted. Everyone likes to feel that his or her efforts do not go unnoticed. Remembering to say “thank you,” even and especially, for things that have become “routine” is important.

It might be as simple as making a cup of tea for a spouse before bedtime, cooking delicious dishes, or taking care of the children so that the other can enjoy an evening out with friends. Doing favors for each other helps to continuously foster mutual appreciation and love.

Spouses Must be There for Each Other

Everyone has his ups and downs. Spouses need to be available to each other for emotional and physical support. Both partners should be able to rely on and confide in each other, thus becoming a source of strength in times of need.

Be Humble

Nobody is perfect. Mistakes happen, and emotions can take over. It is easy to cling to the desire to be “always right,” but selfishness, ego, and pride have no part in the marriage equation. Apologies and forgiveness should be freely exchanged when necessary.

Concentrate on the Good Stuff in a Marriage

It’s all too easy to start nit-picking after a relationship has passed the “honeymoon” stage. Habits that may have seemed innocent enough at the beginning can develop into something that grates on the nerves. If care is not taken, nit-picking can grow into a tendency to see seemingly glaring weaknesses, and this in turn can easily divide a marriage.

Instead of concentrating on real or perceived faults, consider noticing the positives that can make a long-lasting relationship. A great thing to do is to write down all the good qualities a spouse has and to constantly add to the list.

It is important to remember that positive words usually do more good than negative criticism. If spouses build each other up, they and their marriage can become all the stronger.

Building a wonderful marriage cannot be a one-sided effort. It takes both partners working together to achieve success. A husband and wife need to understand each other’s needs and wants, manage money matters in ways that are agreeable to both partners, do things and be there for each other and concentrate on the good things in their marriage.